I guess.

So I guess I'm over it. Completely. Explain the other half of the story that I got wrong please. And yea. I have strawberry shortcake and I'm gonna get sushi tomorrow so I'll be fine. Lets chill, as friends. I'd rather not lose such a cool person like you, so, Coraline? Yea haha.

And I guess I'm done looking for a while. And I guess I'll just wait till someone who wants to cuddle and just lay there happy will come to me. And yea.

ABDC - Britney Spears edition. GO Quest! Good bye TM <3

Epic Buon.

So I'm sad but its nothing I'm not used to ya know? And I'm mad too. Like seriously, What the Fuck! What you did is probably the worst ANYONE has ever treated me. You deserve to get your ass kicked. I don't understand this shit. All your bull shit, "It doesn't feel right conscientiously. There's still D. I don't know." What the fuck man! You wanted to stay friends but you couldn't tell me upfront. This has to be one of the worse feelings. Again, I liked you a lot more than my ex. I know I'm lame but hey, who isn't. What you did is beyond lame, its beyond fucked up, I don't even know what to say about it. I don't even know what to tell you. I'm not going to fucking sell you out and I'm going to keep my promise. I don't know what I'm going to do about this. You ruined this, that's all I'm going to say. I hate this shit and what you did. I hope you and your "hyung" are happy 'cause you fucking took mine away. Thanks for everything, especially for meeting up with him TWO FUCKING DAYS after you said yes. You should've just crushed me completely when you did. You should've just told me the whole fucking truth so I could've just killed myself in the first place. And I wouldn't have to deal with this fucking bullshit you fed me. You fucking got me crying in class and my knuckles are red. I'm ready to go up there and kick your ass myself, but I won't. I'm too much of a good guy to do anything like that. I'm just going to let you live with that guilt and let you live thinking about what could've been. Good luck with your life and I hope you never pull shit like this ever again.

Kiss a Cutie

I got me a new bag of cuties the other day and one of them said kiss a cutie, and I was like, "OMG MYSPACE!," and yeah it turned out like this:and like this:

Anyways. I started this in photo by the way. I'm excited. No school tomorrow and LaVics with Jade, Jami, and I don't know who else haha. Then EVHS! I get to visit my twiin! And my other twiin! And my fagalag and fatty and Tiffany( I need to give her a nick name). Among other people. So yea. Bout it :D

ChenyoBITCH!

FUCK MY LIFE! MOO ISN'T IN MY CLASS ANYMORE!!

Its photo :D

This Quest Does Not Require You To Kill Zombies

LOL to Michael last night. And if you touch that button, the elevator won't turn purple :]

So the past week was EPIC haha. My friends are awesome. Happy Late Birthday to everyone and myself and thank you to everyone who said happy birthday. And here's the thank you!

But anyways. Friday-Monday was pretty much chill time for my 17 on Tuesday :] Hella fun stuff
Wed-Friday: Finals/San Jo chill time.

This weekend is pretty weak sauce. No its Epic Weak Sauce. I got free yogurt though :D. I'm broke with new years money. I need a job again. I want those jeans Dx . And Sadie's was really fun :] And I want to chill with my mirror/reflection/twin :D
And I'm done. This is a really lame blog ahhaha

Orange Chicken

from Panda Express sounds really good right now. I'm having a craving.
Me: Dude, I think I'm pregnant
Andrew: WTF why?!!?
Me: I'm having like crazy OCD cravings
Andrew: Woah, maybe you are.
Andrew: You have been getting bigger.
Andrew: Who's the father?
Me: WTF DID YOU JUST CALL ME FAT YOU LITTLE DICK SHIT!?
Andrew: LOLOLOLOLOL
I love my bestbud :]

So like yea! Thank you Bozena, Christine, and Monica for cheering me up :D

Anyways, Saturday's party is canceled 'cause people suck, but Friday is still up. I don't want to be at home on Saturday. I am able to not be home 'til Sunday morning so...sleep over anyone? AHA. So yea I'm going to go see if the cookie dough thawed and bake them :D

OH I have a letter to give you :] Its post L date prior today ahah

KBye

La Vics

Is the best shit ever, period. And I saw Art, Dale, and Edison there haha

Today marks day 3 of insomnia. I need to get some sleep in somehow. The family phone bill turned out to be $1000 dollars D:. Its mostly hidden internet fees, stupid AT&T.

Well anyways, today was another facade, I was kinda happy when Chi Banh and Kat came over. It made my day, well not as sad. IMMO. You most likely won't get that, and if you do, good job!

So yea, I tokbox-ed today and met some pretty chill downe kids. And I swear, I'm addicted to Tap Tap. I think today was one of the better days. I'm glad today wasn't as gloomy but I'm still not over them, not yet. I have a couple of things I need to give them first and a couple of answers I need to know. I don't want to know through text, I don't want to know through AIM, I need to know in person.

There's this sinking feeling in my gut telling me that they're doing shit but I'm pretty sure they aren't. If you're reading this be honest please, its really killing me inside. IMMO :[

But yea. I'm like leaving FB Video Comments left and right hahah. Kbye

New Resolve and Doubtful

So I guess, I'll get over this but I just have a lot of doubts. I really want to punch him in the face and then hug him but I can't. I think I'm still hung over Orange but I can't, not just yet. I think its going to take some time. I really really liked them and I still kind of do, even though they're an asshole. I think I may be wrong, but I think I was replaced, but that's probably me being jealous. "/. This is really depressing, but I guess being friends is better than nothing. I really wish you would completely delete my little sense of false hope instead of having it there. I mean, I though you did delete it, but my paranoia just got to me. I searched just to see and I saw it. I thought, great, I was right, replaced. I don't know for sure but, "/. My chest is just as heavy and my stomach is in knots. Please, can you at least tell me? At least, that way, I can get over you, even if it hurts, 'cause this hurts more than enough.

Today went by like normal. I was "cheery"and "happy" or so it seemed. Thanks for listening guys. The tears didn't come but I think its okay. I cried to much last night/this morning. I didn't get any sleep again. I have night school later today. Baking cookies later.

I miss having someone to call "babe". I miss having someone to hold. I miss having someone to hole my hand. I miss having someone to care for me as much as I would care for them.

"/ Oh well, strike 7.

No Subject

I have a hunch, but I think I was replaced.

Naranjas Malas Dos

My head's in pain, my throat is dry.
My heart is split, I start to cry.
My chest is heavy, my breath is weak.
My stomach's nauseous, tears down my cheek.
Good feelings lost, sad feelings gained.
These teardrops fall, like pouring rain.
My heart is lost, nowhere to go.
I'll pass the day, fake smiles to show.


Its a lame poem I know, but its really the truth. I had a facade today, a really big one. It looked like I was happy, but, I'm not. I need a hug, and a shoulder to cry on. My chest hurts, my stomach is in knots. I just lost someone I cared for a lot. Okay, I'm done with lame rhyming.

TKD later today. Birthday is coming up, not really as excited anymore, I'm thinking about calling it off but I probably won't. It would probably cheer me up a bit.

Orange, if you read this, don't feel guilty. Its not your fault alone, its both of ours. I'm crying right now but its my fault for rushing it. I really wish you'll take back all of that, because, unlike D, I'm here. I can care for you, keep you company, entertain you, be your shoulder to lean on. I'm willing to find a way somehow. If not, I'm probably going to be like you, like the way you are for D. And please, stop apologizing. Its not completely in your control. I'll be fine sooner or later. You're not the first one to do this.

Home; Sour Oranges

This is pretty much telling a certain someone something. x3 orange x/3

So I just found out that the past couple of days have been nothing but pure infatuation. I just got hurt badly, again, and I'm really sick of it. I'm sick of these tears I always seem to have, I'm sick of being played. I'm just so sick of it all. I want to go back. Not back to the bear exactly, but back.

So really, I already kinda expected it today, when we weren't really talking, and how you were ignoring me. You think you're guilty? How does that make me feel? Its like I dragged you into this and then now I'm crashing down and paying the price. My stomach really hurts right now. Yes, you are being one of those assholes I don't like, and yes, it does hurt, but I do like you, a lot. Maybe we said the 4-letter word to soon, but I don't want to end this. I will keep my promise, I haven't told anyone that can make it worse, and I won't, but all I really want is to talk to you, like have a real conversation, to try to understand things better, but, I highly doubt that's gonna happen. Thanks for the great birthday present :[. Btw, I never felt like a rebound.

Earlier, I was thinking, "are we going to fast?", "will we be like this[a secret] for a long time?", and other things like that. When I saw you earlier, I got kinda sad. You didn't even acknowledge I was there, but later, I lightened up, to see you so giddy and smile-y, it just made me smile (you were so cute xD). Then, when we went to get learn the dance, I thought "Hey, he'll grab me!", and then, you didn't and then my friend did instead. When we went to go get food, I thought, "Maybe I'll make him happy and let him pay for me.", and you seemed really apathetic about it all. So I got sadder. And, I guess for the rest of the day, I dunno. I missed you at the meeting, and at Youth Mass. So I don't know anymore.

To make things clear, I was trying to do "ABC Dates." You ask the person you're dating to pick a letter, any random letter, and you try to come up with something for that letter. Since you picked "L", I was thinking to add on to our bento Lunch, some Late night movies, Licorice, and a Lot of Love in the form of Letters. And I was gonna get you a really nice shirt from my friends clothing company.

So yea, I can't sleep. And I spent the last 30 min crying and posting this. I need a pick me up. Some starbucks/jamba or something.

Oh, Ah, Oh, Oh, Ah, OhAhOhAh

Damn, I'm hella stuck on BB.

So this week was pretty fun even though school started this week. I LOVE ALE :D. Too bad I don't remember most of it. Let see..

I:
Finished Angelic Layer
Finished Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone again
Did a lot of running
Almost finished planning birthday party
Still have a lot more to do.

Well its fine, its almost time for good things to come.
6 days 'till potluck
7 days 'till hotel
10 days 'till 17
16 days 'till Tet
46 days 'till LA
53 days 'till JYP
147 days 'till GRADUATION

:D

Crack Crack Crack

n(1:06:46 AM): weeee
a(1:06:46 AM): ;D
m(1:06:53 AM): infamous twilight whore
e(1:06:55 AM): :D
d(1:07:00 AM): JK DONT CALL ME THAT
a(1:07:03 AM): ill kill you
l(1:07:05 AM): xP
e(1:07:12 AM): Kevin made this one up ahahah :D


GG Ale :D

So this is to recap the past, I don't know, 4 days? 2009 has been pretty good so far :]

So lets start New Year Day! I'm of the market. I'm happily taken by a fruit ahaha :D
The day was pretty chill. Orange slept over and yea we got together xD. We have the same date as my GFFAE does haha. Then yea, we walked to the bus station and just talked. They were on their way home and I was on my way to Eastridge. We said our goodbyes and kept texting 'till thier battery died. So I got to Eastridge and went window shopping then to the dirty section of Barnes&Nobles LOL. Then Camille and Andrew found me then we went to Forever21 for Camille and then headed off to Zumiez and Vi found us and the TweenBetches were reunited ahaha. We walked around some more and got our tickets, then walked around the food court because I was starved but didn't get any food and we just sat on a bench while Vi was being ghetto ahaha. And we sat there and just talked about random crap. Then we watched Benjamin Button! That was a really good movie. Sad but really good. Then wewent to Red Robin's to eat like we did last time but it was closed. Btw, they closed off the mall so we had to walk AROUND Eastridge. It was fucking cold. Then we went to go see if Chili's was opened and it was! We went to eat there but it was only me who ate 'cause they all left before hand :[.But the food was good! :D

January 2nd. This was a bad day. I had a headache and I woke up late for dance practice. So I got there at like 3 and I had to drill a stiff boy. IT WAS FUCKING FRUSTRATING. He missed the first 2 practices so we couldnt switch him with the other prince. D: So I had to deal and it was bad. But everyone else got it :D

January 3rd. Didn't do much 'till like night time. My uncles came back from SoCal and we went to Super Buffet with my Uncle, Auntie, and Cousin :D. It was fun. Then back to my cousin's house to play Wii! It was funny. We SUCK at Wii games, well sorta ahaha. But yea, I'm good.

January 4th. I didn't do diddly. A little HW and yea. I stood outside for viet mass :D and yea

I MISS MY ORANGE


6 More Months 'Till I Leave the Hell Hole
16 More Days 'Till I'm 17
13 More Days 'Till the Party :D
I'm Excited :]